Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Bill Tierney locates Vivi in Iraq 

By now you are all probably familiar with the story of the runaway showgal Bohem C'est La Vie (but some people know her as Vivi). Vivi Whippet to be exact. Familiar with her story especially since MSNBC grocery store tabloid infotainer Rita Crosby is hot on the scent.

Vivi, it seems, became tired and annoyed with the strictures of showbiz, the paparazzi, the smell of anti-allergen dog mousse, the snooty French stage name, the arranged marriage to some bullet-headed Pit Bull hotdog named Rufus. The whole flash in the doggy dish rigmarole. And so off she went on a mad dash. Fleeing down the tarmac at JFK International like a cheetah on the heels of a gazelle. With an entourage of managers, stylists, and public relations hustlers in hot pursuit. "Come back Vivi! We can work this out. If you need some time to yourself it's ok... you forgot your oysters on ice pearl doggie necklace!" Alas... it was to no avail. Vivi had vanished into the cold NY night like a wisp-o-the-whippet. If only someone had thought to bring along the frisbee this never would have happened.

Gone doggo

As far as I know, as I write this here and now, Vivi is still on the run. Perhaps headed over to Aqueduct for some pony action. Who can say for sure. In any case, it appears that several highly trained and experienced human dog psychics (people who can hear high pitched whistles and have a natural propensity for chasing cars) have been alerted to Vivi's unexpected departure.
Three-year-old whippet Vivi, also know as Champion Bohem C'est La Vie, escaped from a travel cage at Kennedy International Airport just days after winning an award of merit at the Westminster Kennel club show.


The dog reportedly bolted across the tarmac of the airport last week, with workers and three cars in hot pursuit.

The dog's co-owner, Paul Lepiane, has told Newsday that the psychics have advised searchers to check the heated cargo buildings near where Vivi escaped.

Lepiane said dog droppings consistent with the whippet's have been found behind an airport cargo building. Link

Good paranormal telepathic thinking! Who in their right mind would have ever thought of checking the buildings in the immediatre vicinity. Especially ones with piles of dog crap scattered around the area. Not me thats for doggone sure. For that kind of analysis you need a specialist. What would we do without specialists.

According to some of the dogged psychic doggie detectives:
"They are telling us that she is alive and they are telling us she is warm," said Honi Reisman, a friend of the dog's owners. "They are saying she's in a building - but there are hundreds of buildings."

Yeah, well, thats not what I heard on Rita Crosby's MSNBC-WowWee-TV show. Her guest doggie psychic said that Vivi was cold and lonely and maybe headed out to the beach at Far Rockaway in search of her friend Moon Doggie. Or, Vivi may have been abducted by the Russian Mob, sold to South American puppy slavers, muzzled and leashed to some galley rigging aboard a Citgo tanker bound for Venzuela, and sold as to a man who needs a best friend in Caracas. Probably fetching sticks with Fidel Castro in Hugo Chavez's jardín de la servidumbre right now! We won't know for sure until Dr. Phil releases an official statement sometime tomorrow or the next day or whenever. If at all.

That's why I think it's time to call in a real psychic detective. Someone with genuine military intelligence creds. A man who can speak to the situation directly. Someone who has actually found the Weapons of Mass Destruction in Iraq! Well, maybe not actually found them, but knows exactly where they are. Sort of. Or something like that.

Who am i talking about you ask? I'm talking about Bill Tierney of course. If you are unsure who Bill Tierney is and are unfamiliar with the kind of amazing paranormal powers he harnesses let this be a reminder to you: Via World-O-Crap, Friday November 18, 2005 (my emphasis added below):
... in February 2003. he appeared on COAST TO COAST AM WITH GEORGE NOORY (Noory is Art Bell's replacement). Here's part of the Coast to Coast recap of the show [...]

Bill Tierney, a former weapons inspector who worked with UNSCOM in Iraq in the late 1990s, was the guest for the first two hours of Friday night's show. He believes that Iraq has nuclear capability and the intention to use such weapons. Further, Tierney claims that he has pinpointed a hidden location in Iraq (map here) where there is a uranium enriching processing facility. "You can't put an underground chamber on the back of a truck," Tierney said, indicating that if an inspection were made in this suggested area, the Iraqis would not be able to haul off the evidence.

Tierney's methods of ascertaining this location were rather unconventional. "I would ask God and just get a sense if something was valid or not, and then know if I needed to pursue it," he said. His assessments through prayer were then confirmed to him by a friend's clairvoyant dream, where he was able to find the location on a map. "Everything she said lined up. This place meets the criteria," Tierney said of a power generator plant near the Tigris River that he believes is actually a cover for a secret uranium facility.

The man talks to God for Christ's sake! He is a secret agent for Jesus! And he cross checks his data through a clairvoyant associate who confirms his findings in her dreams! What in God's name more can you ask for? I ask you.

So hang tough Vivi! Bill Tierney will find you. Well, he might not actually find you strictly speaking. But he knows where you are! Sort of. Like, he has a "valid sense" of where you are. Yes, that's it. He sure does. By the way: are you by any chance near a uranium enriching facility? How about a power generation plant near the Tigris River? I'm getting and image here. Something... something is coming to me... NO!, don't try to cross the Shore Parkway - Vivi....noooo!



Far out on the desert to the north dustspouts rose wobbling and augered the earth and some said they'd heard of pilgrims borne aloft like dervishes in those mindless coils to be dropped broken and bleeding upon the desert again and there perhaps to watch the thing that had destroyed them lurch onward like some drunken djinn and resolve itself once more into the elements from which it sprang. Out of that whirlwind no voice spoke and the pilgrim lying in his broken bones may cry out and in his anguish he may rage, but rage at what? And if the dried and blackened shell of him is found among the sands by travelers to come yet who can discover the engine of his ruin? ~ Cormac McCarthy Blood Meridian

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